The Power of the Single Parent: Time Management

When I was a young mother I was not orderly at all. Whenever I “had the chance” to do something was when I did it. Needless to say, my home was in disarray.

That all changed when I gave my life to Christ. I wish I could tell you that I had someone more mature than me to teach me how to keep my home and raise my children but I didn’t. I learned from the best – The Holy Spirit. As a matter of fact, most of the things I know I learned from Him. Many of the older mothers were too busy trying to be young to teach me anything. So I had to learn and depend on Him. Who better to learn from anyway?

I remember my first training session from the Holy Spirit. My apartment was a mess. As a matter of fact, it was filthy. I was sitting on the couch watching television and all of a sudden I had the urge to get up and clean. I picked up a bottle of disinfectant and began cleaning. When I was done my apartment was orderly, clean and smelling good. I had no idea how long I had been cleaning nor did I care because the end result was fantastic! I looked around and was very pleased. From that day forward I listened to the Holy Spirit on how to keep a home clean and organized. Everything in my apartment had its place and I made sure that everything stayed in it’s place. As a single parent with three children it would seem like a great feat to accomplish. But it isn’t when you have spiritual help. All you have to do is cooperate with God.

What I hear most from parents is that a) there is not enough time in the day; b) I’m too busy; c) they tell me about the 3, 4, 5 or 6 children they have; and d) I’m just not that type of person. Well I’m going to take my time and refute each one of these excuses and you will see that you will be able to manage you time effective and see the results that you desire. Let’s begin:

a). There is not enough time in the day. This is a good one because it would seem to ring true. There are 24 hours in a day. You spend 8 sleeping, 8 at work and 2 hours traveling to and from your destinations. When you get home there’s an hour to cook and an hour to help with homework. That’s 22, right? Right. That other four hours you want your children and everyone else to leave you alone so you can breathe. So, where is the time to be orderly? Here is your answer: God will stretch your time! That’s right. If you ask God to stretch your time he will. You will find that soon you will only need 6 or 7 hours of sleep (that’s an extra 1-2 hours), you will only need to travel 1-1.5 hours to get to your destinations (that’s an ½ to 1 hour extra), you will learn how to combine cooking time and doing homework which will shave off about ½ to an hour. So the total time you have to work with is no longer 4 but 8!

One of God’s names is Alpha and Omega (the Beginning and the End). He is the God of our time. He should start and end your day, everyday. I guarantee you if you put God first he will teach you how to utilize your time more effectively so that you will get more things done.

b). I’m too busy. No you’re not. You just have to prioritize. Your home comes first. When I was younger I spent much of my time at church. I was on three ministries and every church service. This, my friends, was NOT the will of God. I had to step down from two ministries and attend the services that fit into my schedule. Believe it or not, God does not want us to put church first, he wants us to put HIM first. If your house and children are out of order you must review your priorities and make the appropriate adjustments. It’s amazing to me how people can find time to have two jobs but have absolutely no time for their home and children. People, don’t put your home in jeopardy for the dollar bill. It just isn’t worth it.

c). I have 3, 4, 5 or 6 children. God knows how many children you have and it really doesn’t matter to him. He will work with you as you cooperate with Him. There will be many days you will be tired, but if you pray God will give you the strength to keep moving. Stop telling God what you have and ask for what you need. He will provide it.

One practical thing I have learned to do when raising my children was to include them in the household schedule. Did you know that the first stage of developing your children’s work ethic comes from home? I taught my sons how to clean, cook, iron at a very young age. Everyone had chores. Everyone! When my children were four their chore was to pick up the pieces of paper off the floor and put it in the trash. My middle son knew how to iron his own clothes, wash and fold clothes at seven. When I would come home from work, he would have all the clothes neatly piled and ready to be put away. Single parents, you do not have to kill yourselves while raising your children. You will find that they will enjoy housework and will help you but you have to train them.

d) I’m just not that type of person. My answer to that is: You’ll be surprised what you can do when you put forth the effort. Most of us (including myself) use our shortcomings as an excuse not to push ourselves to the next level. This is not God’s way. Joel 3:10 states “Let the weak say that I’m strong!”. If time management is not your forte, fear not. Don’t “not try” or give up. Push yourself. Test yourself. Develop yourself. If you are persistent you will see change in a short period of time.

Just as a side note, I want to tell you that you can be manage your time to spend quality time with your children. When I was raising my sons I made sure that I spent time with them. Every Saturday was Family Day. I made sure that we spent time together, even if I didn’t have money. There are a lot of free events you can take your children to. They will appreciate your efforts and thank you later in life.

No one is a time management guru, even if they claim to be. However, if you give your time over to God you will see pleasant changes in the days ahead.